Back to the Beginning: Seven
Disclaimer #1: No copyright infringement intended to Joss, ME, FOX, WB, UPN, etc. No malice intended, please don't sue.
Spoilers: All of Season Six.
Note #1: This is the seventh in a series, read the others first.
Note #2: The title has nothing to do with the movie SEVEN, but rather the number and what it means when I hear it. (Which is a lot, as you will see)
Note #3: If it is written in italics it is the character's thoughts. (Or dreams, but you can figure those out).
Note #4: Double & Triple edited, and I prayed to the fanfic gods, so I hope the grammar is better from here moving forward - so sorry.
Dedication #1: To the three lovely M's that I have the pleasure and privilege to know.
Dedication #2: To my Boss. If you ever stumble across these fictions, and start to wonder how can I have time to write all of these and work... ahem, well, would you believe I have given up sleep? Oh, and thank you ever so much for living in another time zone and letting me work from home.
Feedback: Yes please, I mean, that is, sure. If you want. (Hey AOL users, certain frames are rejected by hotmail; I am not ignoring you!)
What was I doing? Okay I knew what I was doing. I was kissing her, my hands lost up the back of her shirt, feeling the softness of her skin, thumbs rolling over the clasp of her bra. She had said she loved me. But she didn't say, "I love you," so she didn't really mean it. Buffy Summers could never mean something like that. And this, feeling her pressed against me, though it felt better than anything I had ever known, it wasn't enough. But I couldn't stop, not yet.
God, when did I become the star in my own after school special?
When I pulled my lips away from hers, it elicited a moan. I nipped at her chin, then down to her throat, tongue slipping over the skin, and then I kissed the scar she had on her neck. The scar Angel had given her. It was faint, but still there, a forever reminder that she had once belonged to him, that she had given herself to him. On the night she stabbed me. The night I fell from the roof.
"Faith." She sighed, her hands in my hair, holding me closer. I could have her. But I shouldn't.
She was shaking, even though her arms were strong, hands open flat against Buffy's back.
This felt even better than it had just moments ago, during my wish.
Buffy's mind was reeling, trying to understand the wish, all that she had seen and done. Buffy had to remember that this was now, this was happening at this very moment. Those lips, full and soft, were on her throat, nipping on the tender skin there.
The scar there.
Buffy's breath caught in her throat, Faith's mouth was giving attention to Angel's scar. Buffy knew what Faith was thinking, she was thinking about that night. The hands on her back got lighter, they were moving away.
No, no. Don't think about that Faith. Don't think about that night. I was stupid, I was a bitch, please don't, you have to know,
"Faith, I love you." Buffy sighed, hoping the dark haired slayer would hear her, would believe her.
I lifted my head away from her, looking into her eyes. Even in the dark of the night they still sparkled, they still held me. She said it. I pressed my lips to hers, wildly attacking her mouth with mine, a sloppy, aggressive kiss that I could feel everywhere. Yeah, the whole world dissolved, it was gone and it was just our mouths.
She loved me.
And that might just be enough.
She needed to stop this. Buffy knew if they didn't move she was going to collapse to the ground. Even though she wanted Faith right then, she did not want her on the ground. The hands moving up her back to cup over her shoulders, the mouth sucking on her lips. The smell of Faith filling her nostrils. Her legs shook; she knew they had to stop. She pulled her mouth away, roughly kissing Faith's cheek, before stepping back. Her body was chilled, achingly missing the heat of another body. But not just any body. Faith's body. Buffy extended her hand.
"Come on." Buffy said.
"We need to, erm, go." Buffy looked over her shoulder, and then back to Faith, who looked confused. Smiling Buffy kissed her lips again, then whispered into her ear. "I need to touch you, and I would really like to not be interrupted." She felt Faith's quiver under her lips. "Come on."
The rusted steel catch was thrown over the door, without Buffy even turning her head. She knew where it was, and did it, and then her hands were on Faith's shoulders, pressing her against the stone wall that lined the inside of the crypt. She titled her head down dragging the flat of her tongue over Faith's neck.
"I want you." And she did. Memories, of being with Faith, being in that filthy motel room came flooding back to her, recalling the look on her face as she came, drove her into a frenzy. She had to see that look again; she needed it, like she had never needed anything in her life before. Buffy kissed up her neck, rounding the cleft chin and pulled the full bottom lip into her mouth, sucking hard. She could feel it in Faith, the need, burning just as hot. As Faith's tongue slid into her mouth, her entire body sang.
This time it was going to be different, this time no one would come calling her. This time I would finally get to feel her all of her. As we kissed I pushed against her, moving her to the sarcophagi. When she hit it, I didn't stop kissing, didn't move my lips away, just grabbed her hips in my hands and lifted her up. And she knew what I was doing; she anticipated my moves, moving to lie on the length of it, as I followed her down. I thrust my tongue deeper inside of her mouth, causing her to moan as I moved to cover her body completely with mine. Her hands were on my ass, squeezing and pushing me closer to her in time with the thrusts of my hips. God, I was fucking her mouth with my tongue, and it felt so good that I nearly lost it right then.
Her legs opened and I settled between them, and I was grinding against her. Even with my mouth on hers I could still hear her moans and sighs. Her heart was beating so hard against her chest that I could feel it too.
I kneeled up, pulling my lips away.
"You taste so sweet. Where else do you taste sweet?" I whispered, knowing she could hear me, watching her eyes widen and darken with each vowel, each deepening note of my voice. She was literally shaking. The desire and the need were just dripping off of her body. I could feel it, smell it, taste it in her mouth. God I had to have her, and I wasn't waiting for another goddamn thing. Fuck being scared, fuck being hurt.
Seeing it come over her shocked Buffy. She was being looked at like something to be devoured, and she wanted to be. She wanted to be anything and everything Faith wanted. Buffy, pulled off her jacket, throwing it behind them, and then ripped off her cotton top, and snapped off her bra. Faith's breath caught in her throat with an audible gasp. Buffy grinned at her, watching the other Slayer's eyes moving over her body, taking in the sight of her. She wanted to stay that way, preening and posing for Faith, but not tonight, not right now. They couldn't stop this; it was too intense, too strong.
She leaned up and yanked the tank top off of Faith, and then ripped off the black lace bra, actually hearing the material stretch then snap. Followed by a growl from the brunette who shoved Buffy back down hard onto the stone lid they were on. The smell of wet stone, dust, and earth was being over powered by sweat, and breath and sex. She could smell the heat and arousal coming off of Faith in waves. Teeth latched onto her right breast, roughly, nipping around her nipple and she screamed. The sensation of the bite, laced with pain, and mixed with the tickling softness of Faith's hair as it fell over Buffy's chest and shoulders was exquisite.
Her scream, followed by the lowest of moans sounding out my name snapped something inside of me. As much as I wanted to learn and worship this body, as much as I wanted to be gentle to show her that I did love her, loved her so much it nearly killed me, I couldn't. Not now.
Her nails dug into my back as I roughly cupped her crotch, squeezing it possessively, letting me know that B understood exactly what I wanted, and she needed the same thing. I popped open the seven buttons on her jeans with one tug, and slipped my hand down the front of her panties. I lifted my head, arching my entire body over hers as I howled, feeling how dripping wet she was.
Her fingers nimbly slipped between the cleft of her lips, dragging over her clit, making Buffy arch off of the stone beneath her back. She was soaked, she knew that, could feel it as Faith's fingers moved through it quickly and then she groaned as Faith forced two fingers deep inside of her. She could feel her insides clutching at them, wanting them even deeper, and Faith complied, pushing in deeply up to the base of her hand. She started a hard, slamming rhythm, as her lips found Buffy's again, licking her teeth, feeling the roof of her mouth, exploring every inch of her mouth, as her fingers curled lightly with the thrusts, feeling every inch of her inside. Buffy felt only the fingers inside of her, as Faith took her mouth away and secured it to her collarbone, sucking and licking the salted flesh there. The feeling of being possessed completely washed over her, and a haunting feeling of safety. Her mouth was still open, and she was gasping for breath. She had never been taken like this, never so quickly and completely. And she felt her self surrender to it. To the power that was Faith.
She felt their breasts mashing together, felt the thrusting get even harder, deeper, though how that was possible Buffy wasn't sure. "Yours." Buffy groaned, and felt Faith shiver above her.
And she was. At that moment, feeling her clenching around my fingers, hearing the sounds her body was making as I took her, she was completely mine. I leaned up, feeling her close to the edge and breathed in her ear while twisting my thumb over her rock hard clit.
"Come for me Buffy."
Her body snapped rigid as the release of the orgasm flew out from her center, shooting to the tips of her fingers, her ears, her toes. She came back from it sucking in a gasping breath and shaking uncontrollably. Faith's thrusts slowed, became a gentle caress, before moving out of her completely. She opened her eyes, seeing Faith looking down at her, both of them enveloped in a tent of deep brown hair. She glowed, her skin, her eyes, even the breath she was panting. Buffy felt the hand cup her center, gently this time.
Buffy nodded stiffly. She was.
Faith moved her body lower, kissing along Buffy's chest, the valley between her breasts, before moving to pull a nipple into her mouth. Both girls moaned together. Faith suckled one then the other, before moving her mouth lower. The feel of her tongue, lapping at the skin on Buffy's stomach was enough to make the older girl quiver onto the brink again. She wasn't sure she would be able to handle the sensations when Faith reached the destination she was quickly moving to. She knew she had to speak, but didn't want to. She could stay happily in this crypt for the rest of her life.
Faith rolled her tongue in and out of her belly button, before dropping lower to run her tongue over the top of Buffy's panties. A low, hungry moan came out of Faith's chest. Buffy had to say something.
"I don't want to stop." Her hands lost themselves in Faith's hair.
"Don't." Faith whispered while she dipped her tongue lower.
"Have to." Buffy barely managed.
"No." She pressed her face tight against Buffy's center, inhaling, and pressing down with her tongue.
"AH!" She rolled her head back against the stone.
"Dawn." Buffy groaned, feeling the tongue pressing harder against the cotton. Why did her real life have to enter into this moment, why did she have to be responsible? Couldn't she just for once forget it all? She was so close, just from those lips and tongue near her. She wanted to take back all of her words, and just feel, just be here with Faith.
"What?" Faith lifted her face away, looking at Buffy.
"Dawn, at home, alone." She breathed out. Internally Buffy groaned again at her fate.
"Oh. Right." Faith pushed herself back, landing on the ground in a thud. She moved to their clothes immediately. Buffy could see the worry on Faith's face and moved quickly to her, taking her arms in her hands.
"Faith, no." She searched Faith's face, waiting for the younger Slayer to look into her eyes. "Come home with me."
"I don't know, B." She looked away.
"You don't know? You don't-" Buffy started, the fear around her heart making her voice shrill, but she was cut off by a searing kiss from Faith.
"I know." Faith breathed, and then kissed her again.
Her leg was itching. It was so not fair. She was stuck here, in the house, all alone, while Buffy was out patrolling. Dawn was so angry at the state of the world, that she had broken her leg, and couldn't even sneak out with the huge blue cast on her leg. It wasn't her fault that she had turned wrong. She damned everyone and thing she could think of in the past two months for having to wear this damn thing. What made it worse was she never saw Faith any more, and when she did, Faith was always sad and saying she was sorry. That wasn't the Faith she knew and loved, that was some weird Faith doppelganger. Everyone knew it had been a mistake, and accident. Why did Faith always blame herself?
She grabbed the long ruler Buffy had gotten her and shoved it deep inside the cast, leaning her head back and moaning in contentment. That felt so much better. She twisted it along her calf, when the front door opened slowly. She rolled her head over expecting to see Buffy, the sad depressed Buffy.
Instead she saw her sister, looking disheveled, her hair messed, grinning from ear to ear, and her hand extended, like she was pulling someone inside. Her heart picked up its pace, wondering who it was, who had managed to make her sister smile in a way that she had not seen in a very long time. Dawn saw the length of a strong, bare, forearm and squealed.
"Dawn, oh, hey." Buffy said, turning and looking through the archway between the entry hall and the front room. She was still grinning from ear to ear. Faith came fully into view, looking flushed, and tousled too. "What are you doing up?"
"Waiting for you, duh. It is what I do." Dawn tried to get up, wobbled a bit, and then righted herself. "Did you two run into a lot of nasties?" They looked like they had gone a couple of hard rounds with something. She could even see scratches on Faith's shoulders.
"Hmm?" Faith asked, looking at Buffy, and not Dawn. Dawn furrowed her brow, and noticed as Buffy nudged Faith with an elbow. "Oh!" Faith looked over to Dawn, grinning. "Not so much. One that gave me hell of a fight."
"Cool." Dawn nodded.
"So you guys hungry? Want me to make a pizza or something?" The two Slayers looked at each other, and then Buffy cracked up.
"No, Dawn." She said through her laugh. "We aren't hungry."
"Oh." Dawn pouted. "So, Faith, how have you been?"
"Five by five, Kiddo." She replied, though without the usual pop in her voice.
Dawn then watched Buffy set her other hand on Faith's arm. Realization washed over the young Summers and she took a tentative step back.
"Okay, well, boy," she extended her arms, "Am I tired." She manufactured a yawn. "So see you tomorrow." She moved past them, grinning wickedly. Finally something was happening, and Dawn Summers couldn't be happier.
"Do you think she knows?" Faith asked, turning her head to watch Dawn scamper up the stairs.
"I think it is safe to say that she knows." Buffy smiled, rubbing her hand up and down the length of Faith's forearm.
"Are you okay with that?" Faith asked, turning to look at Buffy, while stepping a little bit closer unconsciously.
"Yeah." Faith smiled.
"Did you know that you have the cutest cleft," Buffy ran the tip of her finger over it on Faith's bottom lip "right here on your lip."
"Nothing about me is cute, B."
"Oh I beg to differ, F." She leaned forward and sucked Faith's bottom lip into her mouth, greedily. "Hmm. How did you do it?"
"Do what?" Faith asked huskily.
"Get to be so sexy?"
"Gift from the gods I guess." She smirked.
"Must be." Buffy agreed. Faith pulled her into a slow, searing kiss, languidly dancing their tongues together, leaving Buffy panting and feeling the kiss everywhere. Faith pulled away, only enough to scoop Buffy into her arms. "Only this once Faith." Buffy said running her hands through the dark hair, marveling at the softness she found between her fingers.
"That you carry me up these stairs."
"Ah, sure thing, B." Faith kissed her nose, beginning the climb, taking her time to make sure each step was sure.
"Next time I carry you." Buffy whispered into her ear before kissing her cheek, and then leaned back to look into Faith's eyes.
"Okay." Faith grinned.
"Willow?" A whispered voice on the other end of the phone, and the redhead in question rubbed at her right eye, confused as to what was happening, not having remembered the ringing phone, or sitting up to answer it.
"Hmm? Wha?" She mumbled out.
"Willow, it's Dawn." Whispered, and Willow's eyes opened wide and she sat up in her bed, causing Miss Kitty to be propelled across the room.
"Dawnie? What's wrong? Why are you whispering?"
"It happened!" Dawn was still whispering.
Frantic now, full of trepidation and fear, Willow clutched the phone tighter.
Once in the bedroom, Faith righted Buffy on her feet, and then moved to take the coat from her shoulders, leaning to kiss her neck as she moved it off of Buffy's arms. The kiss was soft, fleeting. Buffy closed her eyes, as Faith took the blouse in her hands and inched it up over her torso.
"Are you sure?" Faith whispered in her ear. Buffy bit her lip, nodding. Faith pulled the blouse off of Buffy, who had left her bra in the crypt. Dropping the shirt to the floor, Faith lightly set her fingers on Buffy's shoulders, and danced her fingers down the skin that tingled and constricted in their wake, pulling them over the rise of her breasts, moving so her index fingers slipped over Buffy's tight nipples. Her head fell back, blonde hair moving against her shoulders as she moaned. Faith didn't stop her hands, dancing them over the hard muscles of her stomach. When her fingers, all ten, dipped just between the waistband of her pants, Buffy sucked in her breath and looked forward again. Faith's eyes were glazed, dark and smoldering. They roamed from Buffy's waist, pausing on her breasts, causing both Slayers to suck in a silent breath, in sync, before their eyes met, and languidly Faith leaned forward and set her lips on Buffy's. The older Slayer's mind swelled, awed at the softness of Faith's lips, the tenderness conveyed in the kiss. There was so much emotion conveyed in that kiss that was chaste. Buffy Summers felt her heart groan, and her mind drift. It was that kind of kiss.
She didn't feel anything but the tingling of her skin, the swell of her lips beneath Faith's, until her pants were pooled at her ankles, and the air was the only thing on her skin, making her achingly aware that she was naked, and the woman before her was fully clothed. Buffy's eyes opened, to see Faith looking at her with wonder.
It was terrible, she just knew it, Buffy was hurt, or worse. It just had to be terrible, and Willow's mind was in full-blown babble mode, even if her lips were parched and silent.
Buffy's hurt? And Dawn is at the hospital and has to whisper because the doctors are giving Buffy her last rites, and there is no way that I can bring her back again, because I don't have what I need, and maybe I shouldn't be bringing her back, because what if it was a natural death, and what if Faith doesn't know? Oh Goddess, Faith! She will be destroyed, as much as they are avoiding each other, I know she loves Buffy and this will shatter her.
"Willow they came home together." Dawn whispered happily, making Willow's brain pull on the handbrake, hard. She skidded to such a stop, that her body actually swayed.
"What?" She squeaked out.
"Faith came home with Buffy."
"Are they okay?" Willow asked, still consumed with trepidations.
"They were making goo-goo eyes at each other."
"Oh!" Willow let out a deep breath, relief washing over her. "Dawnie, that is great news, but did you have to call and scare the shit out of me?"
"I had to tell someone," the young girl whined.
"Okay, okay. Why don't you get some sleep?"
She sat on the edge of the bed, watching, her mouth just a little open, as Faith tossed off her top, and then off went the heavy boots. Buffy Summers was physically shaking as the pants were pressed down, moving over thighs, then knees, and then when Faith stepped completely out of them. Now it was her turn to look in wide-eyed wonder. She had never seen a woman's body that was this beautifully perfect, she had never imagined the waves of desire she could feel coursing through her, just by looking at the curve of flesh from the side over the hip. She had never imagined she could feel this way for another woman. Not that Buffy was surprised. Faith always made her feel things she thought she was incapable of. Brown met hazel eyes, and Buffy held out her hands, beckoning Faith to take them.
This time was so different, as Faith bypass the hands, and her arms moved around the back of Buffy, palms tentatively touching the skin, fingers moving on her back, and then,
OH MY GOD
Buffy was on her back, with the length of Faith's naked body pressed against her own, being held in a strong hug. She could feel the heat of skin, the press of the softest breasts against her chest, puckered nipples burning holes through her skin. Feather soft kisses and a breath on her neck, moving on a trail that was sending a flush of want through her entire body as they rounded her chin, and Faith's lips pulled Buffy's own into a slow kiss. Nipping at the lips, just learning them, softly, gently. She had never imagined it could feel like this. She had never been with anyone, not even that one night with Angel, where it was this tender. The tip of Buffy's tongue brushed Faith's bottom lip, asking for permission.
My whole body shuddered when I felt her tongue, and I deepened the kiss. It was like I had no choice, even though my body was screaming at me to take her hard and fast again, my heart was purring like a contented kitten, telling me to take my time.
This was exactly like I dreamed it could be. Exploring her mouth, feeling her fingers moving over the length of my back; her, Buffy, naked underneath me. It felt like there was nothing that I could do that would be wrong, that everything was okay, and appreciated.
The fear was slowly subsiding in me, as my hands began learning her skin. I felt it contract beneath the roughness of my fingers, her arms, her sides, and her neck. Even while we kissed and I moved my fingers over her upper thighs did the skin tighten and move. And I knew mine was doing the same while B's hands were learning, exploring my body as well.
The ache, the throbbing in her center had never gone away since the first kiss in the cemetery, but now, after what seemed like hours of kisses and tender touching and exploration, Buffy felt her insides screaming. The tongue swirling in her mouth, the hands caressing her body, it was keeping her in neutral, revving, but she was caught, she couldn't calm down, and she couldn't just explode.
Arching her back she rolled over, moving on top of Faith. She slipped down, settling her stomach between Faith's legs, feeling the scalding hot, dripping wet core grazing her skin. With an animalistic groan she flexed and pressed her self against Faith, feeling it burning her. Her mouth latched onto Faith's sweat slicked shoulder, sucking, and licking in time, while the woman beneath her shook with need, but there seemed to be an agreement, unspoken, between the Slayers. This wasn't about getting off, this wasn't about the release. This was about them, about loving each other.
I love her. I am in love with her.
Buffy's lips pulled into a grin as they moved down Faith's skin, slipping past the side of her breasts, eliciting a whimper from the brunette. She could tell that Faith was locked in the same heady place that she was, just swelling with emotions. Buffy's kisses were becoming stronger, turning into nips and smacks, as she found her mouth on the strong muscles of Faith's stomach. Her eyes had been squeezed shut, now they slowly opened.
She had thought seeing Faith, in the wish verse, coming had been the most beautiful thing she had ever seen, but that was nothing to the look of pure wanton desire she was seeing now. Faith's head was being held up, her neck straining, her eyes wide and fierce as they looked down over the valley of her breasts, to Buffy. Keeping their eyes locked, Buffy, with the flat underside of her tongue traced a line from Faith's belly button to the top of her sex. Faith's body shook, her eyes widened.
Everything was warm, and safe, to Buffy. She felt complete, feeling all of this skin touching her own. The smell of sweat and skin and arousal assaulted her deliciously from where she rested; now feeling Faith's pulsing sex against her breasts. She licked back up, from the hairline to the belly button, dipping her tongue inside, and hearing the deep moan coming from Faith. She could stay here all night, learning, loving every inch of Faith's body. But she was fairly certain Faith would be begging before long for something more, just as her own body was beginning to.
She trailed strong kisses along the flesh, not wavering her eyes from Faith's now black ones. She was lost in them. Her lips sensed a difference below them, and she lowered her eyes.
The long jagged scar. The one she had put there. Ashamed for ever being so callous, for ever being so blindly evil to the amazing woman beneath her, Buffy closed her eyes, and lowered her head back to it, hoping to love it away.
My head snapped back, burrowing deep into the pillow. She hadn't even touched me yet, not really, but the feeling of her tongue, lapping against the scar, tracing it, feeling it, shoved me roughly one step closer to the edge. I could feel the kisses she was covering me with inside of me. Like her tongue was running beside all of the veins inside of my body, taking with it the tingling sensation of feeling worshipped.
"Please," it barely sounded like me, so fragile that one word. Did she know how much power she held over me?
Buffy moaned deeply hearing the plea from Faith that was so soft; it would have been missed by anyone other than a Slayer. She sucked the jagged, pale line once more, harder though, as her hands each moved up to each cup a breast. The nipples were already puckered and hard, and as she pressed they tickled the center of her palms. Faith's hips involuntarily bucked. Like a spasm, her body telling Buffy's what was needed, and what was wanted. Shifting her body, Buffy moved up and pulled the right nipple into her mouth softly, letting it sit there, as if it were a piece of chocolate. It was so soft, Buffy did expect it to melt. It only got firmer, and grinning again, she sucked it deeper into her mouth.
For Buffy, being with Faith was a thousand times better than she had ever imagined; it was amazing, and real. Nothing and no one had ever gotten her close to feeling like this. She moved to the left breast, while her fingers found the right. A scorching burst of heat seemed to come off of Faith's body.
"Are you sure?" Buffy whispered looking up into her flushed face, Faith's eyes closed tightly.
"Yes, god yes!" Faith moaned, and that was all Buffy really needed. She lowered her body in one fluid move, and inhaled deeply at the sight before her.
Her lips pressed against the top of Faith's thigh, and a deep shuddering moan came from above while the legs opened wider. Her tongue moved slowly through the dark slayer's slit.
"God, Buffy!" She groaned, and Buffy attacked. Her mouth capturing, her tongue probing. She had never done this before, and was glad. She wanted Faith to be the only woman she tasted like this. She wanted to be the last woman who tasted Faith like this.
My eyes rolled back into my head, I know that they did, and I wasn't even sure that I was really alive. How could this be happening? How could Buffy Summers be up to her ears in-
No thinking, no nothing but her wicked tongue inside of me. Oh, God, this was really happening!
What was she thinking? What did this mean to her? It sure as hell did not feel like she was fucking me, not as her tongue pressed against my clit, before being replaced by her lips. This felt wholly different that anything I had ever done before. She knew exactly what to do, where to go, and greedily was lapping up all of me. I had been on the edge since slipping inside of her in the crypt, one more stroke and I was done for.
In a pulse, in a shiver, she felt it. Intimately close enough to feel the muscles contracting, twitching under her lips, as Faith came for her. Buffy was lapping up the sweetness that was Faith, her Faith. She didn't want to leave this place, so warm, and tasting so sweet and good. Buffy wanted to stay where her mouth was nestled, rolling her tongue over the lips, the hard clit, that with every pass made Faith's muscles clench again.
"B?" A soft moan, and Buffy slowly raised her head, seeing Faith, her head back, eyes closed. Her hands were clutching at the bedspread, and Buffy was surprised that they were not ripped to tatters.
She moved up, keeping her body against Faith's, and hovered, their faces barely separated. Instinctually Faith leaned up and captured Buffy's lips in her own, kissing them, tasting them, possessing them. The feeling of it made Buffy's center convulse and her nearly sob with desire.
She was amazing. As we kissed, I could taste us, me on her lips and tongue mixed with her own saliva. It was too much, too erotic, too perfect. I could feel her body tensing, needing the same release.
I slipped my hand between our bodies. She was so wet, slick that with ease I entered her with two fingers.
Buffy pulled her mouth away to pant as she was filled by Faith. Her hips pressed down, onto the fingers, forcing them even deeper. Faith moaned beneath her, and began slow, even thrusts, as she kissed Buffy's neck, moving her lips to her ear.
"Faith, what are you feeling, right now? At this moment?" Buffy panted out. She had to know what this meant for Faith, what she wanted.
"What?" She choked out, brown eyes going wide in disbelief.
"Please, I need to know. Tell me?" Buffy slipped hand between their bodies and entered Faith keeping the same rhythm. They were moving together.
A loud sound broke from Faith's throat, and as they moved, joined, she cried out, sobbing, "I, oh my God."
And Buffy knew. She pressed their foreheads together as they rocked, their bodies becoming slicker with sweat, their faces glistening as they both began to cry, staring into the depths of the others eyes. Buffy knew. Faith loved her, Faith needed her, wanted her. And Buffy felt exactly the same. All the pain, and the hurt, and the distrust burned painfully in each of them, as they realized this was where they were meant to be, together, like this.
Buffy increased the thrusts from her hand, feeling Faith's insides constrict slightly, and the brunette increase her thrusts matching stroke for stroke. Both Slayers instinctively curled their fingers at the same moment, reaching for the place that rested deep inside. Both Slayers knowing exactly what the other was feeling.
"Love you." Faith sobbed, voice thick with emotion, as Buffy felt her clamping around her, the muscles so strong, as she came. That moment, that act was hands down the most wondrous thing Buffy had ever known.
"Love you." Buffy echoed, feeling her own release coursing through her, and she knew, without a doubt she was never in heaven. This. This is heaven.
I couldn't remember how or when I fell asleep, but then my eyes opened the first thing I did was tense. Every muscle in my body was strung tight and ready to snap.
WHERE AM I??
Then I felt it. The ache in my stomach, back and thighs; the delicious soreness that it had been way too fucking long since I had felt. And her, B, her arm over my waist, her head on the pillow next to mine.
A grin slowly came over my lips. It was real. I knew it was completely real. All of it. Laying in Buffy Summers bed, naked, my body feeling like it had been thoroughly fucked, backwards and forwards for hours on end. How'd I know this wasn't a dream? Cause I fucking had to pee!
I slipped out from under her arm carefully. Then stood beside the bed, looking down at her. Blonde hair going in every direction, mouth just slightly open. There was a touch of dried spittle on the right corner of her mouth.
"You are beautiful Buffy Summers." I whispered, shocking myself with the softness of my voice. This was completely amazing, and I had no idea what in the hell I had done to get so lucky.
I backed out of the room quietly, moving quickly to the bathroom. When I got there, I realized I was naked, and felt a blush crawling up my neck. What the hell was I thinking? I did not need Kiddo to see me walking through the house naked. I was berating myself as I washed my hands. And looked up grinning, seeing the hickey that was nearly flashing red on my hip. Yeah, Kiddo didn't need to see that.
Buffy was sitting at the dining room table, staring down at the half empty plate before her, her right hand held in mid air, with a bite of eggs on it. She wanted to groan again in wonder at the yumminess of the meal.
Waking up to a house full of tantalizing scents, those of waffles, and eggs, and bacon. Then to come down here, to see Faith moving about the kitchen, cooking for her had moved her near tears. On the surface it was only breakfast, but Buffy knew that it could also mean so very much more.
Buffy looked over at Faith, who was sitting in the chair beside her, holding a cup of coffee, watching as she ate. Faith had finished her breakfast in record time, and now was just watching Buffy.
"I have never tasted anything so good." Buffy smiled widely. "Thank you so much."
"You like it enough to reward the cook with a kiss?" Faith asked softly, setting her cup down.
"You bet." Buffy smiled leaning forward to be greeted by those lips, brushing over her own. Her heart jumped at the softness of those lips, memories of them on her skin. A low, approving growl came from deep in her chest. She wanted to feel them again.
"Buffy, I smell something-" Dawn began but stopped, freezing with the door open in her hand. "Faith?" She asked with a huge grin. Buffy leaned back, looking at her sister. It was confirmed, Dawn knew what was going on, and by the size of that smile, didn't seem to mind one bit.
"Hey Kiddo." Faith pushed back her chair. "Have a seat, I have a plate all ready for you." Buffy watched as Faith moved to pile a plate high with food, forgetting for a moment, Dawn's presence as the brunette bent over to take the bacon from the warm oven.
Mmmm. Faith bent over the kitchen table....
Buffy licked her lips at the thought, but then jumped slightly when a hand was on her arm. She swung her head to look at Dawn, who gave her a goofy grin.
"Hey, Buffy." Dawn wiggled her eyebrows, and the elder Summers felt a blush creep up her neck. "Something you need to tell me?" Dawn looked from Faith who set the plates down, to Buffy again.
Ha! Kiddo was playing B like a well-tuned piano, and it was hilarious watching B squirm under the looks she was being given. She looked sixteen again, well what I figured she must have looked like, seeing as how I had been nowhere around back then. She was just a pile of twitches and blushes. I knew I should save her, but it was kind of funny to see it. Her trying to talk, mouth moving like a fish on the shore.
"Are you okay with this, Kiddo?" I asked, and B looked at me with so much thanks and love in her eyes that I had to force myself to stay sitting down, to not pull her into my arms.
"Oh, who me? I am so okay with this! I mean if this is what I think it is. Is it what I think it is?"
"Pretty sure it is." I grinned, proud at my ability to finally render the Summers women helpless. B's hand found my thigh under the table with a squeeze. My muscles jumped at the feeling of her touch. I moved my eyes to B's looking into them, and seeing the same emotions reflected that I was feeling. Passion, need, NOW! Damnit! Why did I have to leave here today? Why couldn't it be any other day? Visions of her and I up stairs on her bed flashed through my mind while we shared that look. I groaned inwardly. Never had I wanted someone as much as I wanted this woman.
She squeezed again.
Dawn was sitting on the stairs, knowing she shouldn't be, but unable to look away. Down below her, Faith had her hands on Buffy's hips, and her sister's blonde head was resting against Faith's chest, as they talked softly. From where she was, Dawn could not hear them, or make out the words. But she knew that there was a tenderness there, a moment happening.
She had never in her wildest dreams imagined that she would see this type of display from Faith, as she moved her hand to the back of Buffy's head, running her fingers through her hair. A lazy smile was on the Dark Slayer's lips as she spoke more.
She wondered as she picked at the lint on her shorts if she would ever have a moment like that. Buffy tilted her head up to Faith's and they kissed, and it shot through Dawn's heart. Would she ever have someone in her life that loved her as completely as Faith loved her sister?
She hated to even begrudge them anything, but she was jealous and she couldn't stop herself from feeling that way. She could see the devotion in both of their eyes. And she wanted it. What they had. She wanted to know what that felt like, for herself.
Buffy sat on the front steps, watching Faith walk away. She had pouted and frowned, taken pretty much everything out of her arsenal of weapons, and still Faith had managed to escape her, to go to work. On one hand, Buffy was proud of Faith's dedication to this job, the pride she took in showing up there every day to cook for hours, even staying later once and awhile to help serve the less fortunate that found themselves at St. Michael's door. But on the other hand she had wished that instead Faith could have stayed. She wanted to make love to Faith again, all day, and, hell if she was honest, for the rest of her life. She would let the world fall, let the Hellmouth open if she could just have stayed in Faith's arms, feeling loved.
She was still amazed at the tenderness, at the passion that they both had felt last night. It was a night filled with firsts for her. And she knew it had meant just as much to Faith. That was clear in the tears she had shed. Her beautiful and perfect Faith. Buffy was fairly certain that she had never made love, not like they had. A connection that went beyond them both being Slayers, went beyond them being women had been forged last night, and Buffy knew she would love and want Faith for the rest of her life.
She remembered things, things from her time spent in the wish verse with the younger Faith, the things that she had said that she needed. They seemed to be the same things the Dark Slayer needed now, but would be unable to explain. A place in the world, to be loved completely for who she was, inside and out. Buffy could do that. Felt it with her entire self. She would need and love Faith from today until the day she died.
I knew I shouldn't be, but I was day dreaming, thinking about her. The texture of her skin under my finger tips, the smell of her as she slept. I had to be careful where these thoughts ran, because I was sue chef today, which meant a day of me and the knife, and at this point nothing would suck more than lobbing off a finger, while lost in a lusty memory.
I couldn't believe that I had cried like that, just sobbed like there was nothing in the world that I could have done to stop it. But it was like she had read my mind, known exactly what my fears were, and answered them all.
But what will happen next?
I wondered as I moved onto cutting onions. I mean last night was wonderful, more than wonderful it was about a million of my dreams come true, but after she had time to think about it, would she regret being with me? And could I really let myself love her? I wanted to, but the nagging fear was creeping through my guts again. Could I love her enough? Would she hurt me again?
Dawn had called her again that morning to confirm that her suspicions on last nights telephone call where correct, that Buffy and Faith were together, but Willow as well as Dawn were still unclear as to the scale of this relationship. Willow knew that both Slayers were very sexual. But would this be more? Would Faith allow herself to accept it as more? That was the redhead's concern as she walked through the streets of downtown Sunnydale, making her way to the house that had begun to be referred to as SC - Slayer Central, even though, so far both Slayers had never been there at the same time. But hopefully all of that as about to change.
"Willow?" She stopped in her tracks, turning her head. Her mother stood not seven feet away from her, holding a brown paper sack against her chest, looking at Willow as if she where seeing a ghost. The little Willow, the child that still lived inside of her wanted to turn on her heel and bolt, but the stronger, new Willow took a breath and stepped closer.
"Hello, Mother." She said, clasping her hands in front of her, to stop them from shaking. Growing up, sure the kids at school had been skilled at picking her apart, but no one, not even Queen C could hold a candle to Shelia Rosenberg when it came to shattering Willow's confidence.
"I thought you were in Arizona, getting," Shelia stepped closer, dropping her voice before continuing, "treatment." Her voice was laced with the sting of humiliation and as dash of disapproval. Willow felt the skin below her right eye twitch.
"I never went to Arizona, Mother."
"But you were supposed to go there, to get treatment, help for the drug addiction. I am most displeased that you are here. Did you escape? Are you using drugs again?" The leering looks she was on the receiving end of, chilled her, and somewhere, inside of her the little child that was once Willow Rosenberg yelled "Fuck it" and slammed against the confines of the place this woman had put her in for years, shattering them.
"I never used drugs, I never touched drugs."
"Don't stand there and lie to me Willow. I saw you, as did your Father. What was happening to you is only-"
"No!" Willow snapped. "God, you are so blind. You have to be, to still live like you do, believing in things. Don't you notice that no one walks around this town at night, don't you remember my graduation?"
"You are high now aren't you?" She scowled.
"I never used drugs! It was magic!" Willow hissed, trying to keep her voice low, so the people around them on the street didn't stop to listen.
"Magic?" Her Mother said with a scoff.
"Yeah, God! Don't you remember trying to burn me at the stake? Is that ringing a bell for you Mother? It should, and you were right, back then. I am a witch, and I got involved in some really bad things, when I, when Tara-"
"Tara? Oh you mean that homely girl-"
Willow felt her eyes flash a deep dark red. The words on Shelia's tongue died before leaving her lips. Shelia Rosenberg's eyes rounded, seeing what she had just witnessed, the rage passing over her daughter's face. Willow knew it, felt her Mother's shock and fear.
"I will never speak to you again." Willow said, her voice steal, and the woman before her shivered and stepped back. "You have no right to ever say her name again. If you ever see me, turn and go the other way, because you have no idea what I am capable of Mother, and trust me, you don't want to find out."
"And that one is for what?" Dawn asked him, swinging her legs as she sat on the edge of the table in the library of the house. She had arrived a few minutes earlier, hoping to talk something over with Willow, when the young witch arrived. Holburn was greatly enjoying the young Miss Summers' company, if only she could refrain from her heel hitting the table leg. It was after all an antique.
He looked down at the sword in his hand, that he was cleaning. It was a short sword, for close combat, but looking at her again, he knew this was just her way of inviting him into conversation. Something that she had grown up used to. So much happening around her at all times, that she had been trained that the only way for her to enter into a conversation was with a question of something that might be of relevance to the discussion but not the path she wanted it to go down. He found this young girl most interesting, and not only for her history as once being the mythical Key, but for living with a Slayer, knowing one in ways that had never been documented. He would have to remember to ask her questions for his Diary. Realizing that her blue eyes were fixed on him, wide and waiting he knew he needed to get back to the moment. He cleared his throat. "Do you really care what type of sword this is, or is there something else on your mind?" he asked.
"Well, there is something on my mind, but I am not sure how you will take it."
"Really?" He asked, wondering what it could be that would make her doubt his acceptance. He thought for a moment, had he not proven himself open minded and wanting to be a member of the group? He prided himself on his acceptance of every member of this rag tag family, from Xander and his vengeance demon girlfriend, to Faith and her love of knives. He really could not imagine something that would startle him.
"Well, it might be you know, weird."
"Dawn, really I think that I have proven that something 'weird' does not phase me." He smiled crossing his arms, and liking the resignation on her pretty young face.
"Okay, you should be given a heads up, with them due back here later this afternoon." She shrugged, and then laughed. "Wouldn't want you walking in on Buffy and Faith, you'd have a heart attack."
"Shouldn't you be doing, you know, something?" She asked, looking down at him as he sat on the couch, remote in one hand and a beer in the other. "It is only eleven in the morning, and already you are drinking." Anya set her hands on her hips.
"An, we went over this. Sunday, here, for me, a man, this is what happens. I wake up, I come into the living room, I sit and I eat and drink all day." He leaned his head back to look up at her, but one eye kept slipping back to see the action on the television screen.
"Not all men do this, you know. I know that they don't. There are priest, they work on Sunday. And then you have Mr. Strand. I am quite sure he works today as well."
"Right." He took a swig of beer with a chuckle and then smiled at her, "You do know they aren't real men."
"And how would you know the difference between a real man or not, Xander Harris. You are always sitting there on the couch." Anya snapped back.
"Whoa there." He held up his hands. "Why are we fighting about this? I like to watch the games, I am sorry but I do. A little bit of normalcy goes a long way in my book."
"What is that supposed to mean?" She shot back. "It is the demon things again isn't it?"
"Ack, no!" He exclaimed. "God, why are we fighting about this?" He rubbed his forehead.
"I don't know."
"But it is a fight, right?"
"Yes, about nonconesquential things, but a fight none the less." A slow grin came over her features.
"What?" Xander asked, looking a little pale around the eyes.
"We used to have that thing, you know, how we would make up after a fight." Her eyes began to sparkle. "Want to fight a little bit more?"
"I think that might be possible, I am an asshole, after all." Xander grinned, and Anya walked over and sat on his lap, slipping her arms around his neck.
"That is true." Anya smiled, taking the beer from his hand, and setting it on the coffee table, trying to ignore the sounds from the television behind her.
"I think I might need to fight for another hour at least." Xander kissed her chin.
"We can't skip that part?" Anya offered.
A buzzer sounded, shattering the moment between them. It was the door. She wondered who it could possibly be.
"This had better be important." Anya groaned, standing back up. Xander reached for the remote and turned back up the television. And Anya knew he would not be moving until much later in the day. Regardless of the amount of sexual innuendo she dangled in front of him.
"I doubt it. But that is okay, because I am staying right here, in front of the TV."
Anya went to the door, and opened it up, and stepped back, surprised to see her standing there.
"Can we talk?"
She swallowed her anger as she walked through the open front door of Holburn's house. She didn't need to be angry, not now. It was no ones fault, other than her parents, and Willow would be damned it she took it out on Holburn, or Dawn. She wondered where they were, as she walked into the library. The whole house was shaping up, looking functional and very much like something the Council would approve of. The bookshelves lining the wall were now full. With giddiness she could imagine herself spending gross amounts of time here, just reading everything taking it in.
Imagine the size of the library at the home office in London. She mused.
Dawn was sitting on the edge of the table, watching Holburn as he polished a sword, and looking at the seven or so still on the table, it looked like to Willow that he would be there for some time.
"Willow!" Dawn exclaimed, hopping down, hobbling over to throw her long arms around the Wicca's neck. She held onto Willow with an exuberance of a much younger child, and whispered in her ear. "Be careful mentioning Buffy and Faith, I made him faint once already."
"Really?" Willow asked, leaning back slightly and looking over at Holburn, who smiled sheepishly. "And why would Mr. Strand faint?"
"I am still not used to the heat here, and young Miss Summers caught me off guard?" He offered.
"Is that it?" Willow snapped moving closer to him. "Nothing to do with the fact that they are both women?" She felt it bubbling inside of her again, and tried to swallow the rage down.
"Goodness, no, nothing of the sort, I guarantee you."
Willow set her hands on her hips, still not completely convinced. She squinted at him, trying to read his body language.
"Imagine if you will, Ms Rosenberg, that I am Faith's Watcher, and that here, in this place something wonderful has happened. That there are two living Slayers, who will work side by side, and who it seems, if young Miss Summers is to believed, have found love together. That is quite unprecedented and well, I must confess, rather amazing." He leaned back in the chair, beaming as he spoke.
"So your passing out was due more to the fact that you will be able to write about them, being together, fighting as one, than being disturbed by their sexuality." Willow added for clarification. She was on a tear today, and would gladly offer up a stern tongue-lashing if Holburn were being homophobic.
"Precisely. Can you even image the untapped wonders this union may bring about? There is nothing, absolutely nothing that is impossible. It is all unknown you see, and where this relationship may lead, in terms of their powers, their journey through life, well, really. Can you sense my excitement? It is all completely new, and anything can happen." There was a jovial and childlike quality to his voice. Willow's shoulders relax, he was making sense, and she could feel the slight tingle in the back of her mind. The learning that could be done. She would probably have fainted away too.
"So it is true then, Dawnie?"
"Yeah, they confirmed it before Faith went to work. You should have seen them."
"Did they seem happy?" Holburn asked.
"I have never seen Faith smile so much. Oh! And she made breakfast. And it was good." Dawn exclaimed.
"Faith does work as a chef-" Holburn started.
"But Buffy has been known to ruin cold cereal, so a Slayer who can cook is a really amazing thing." Willow added, sitting down at the table. She looked up at the wall of books again, nearly feeling herself salivating. There was so much to learn, so much growing she could do. She wondered how Holburn would feel if she just stayed here, reading for the next year. She smiled. He probably wouldn't mind at all. He would enjoy not only the company, but they could have endless discussions about the Slayers.
But would there be too many distractions? Could she concentrate? And seeing Faith and Buffy together, happy and in love, even though she wished the best for them, how would that make her feel, seeing something that she would never have again. Never again without her Tara. Her Love.
They were both sitting on Xander's bed, leaving him to the game on the television. Anya was curious that it seemed not to bother the Slayer in the slightest, Xander unwashed, sitting there staring at the square box before him. He had never been like this, not before. Before he had been constantly attentive, always jumping up at the sound of her voice, moving quickly to assist her in whatever she needed. What had changed? Anya had liked that his world, when not fighting vampires or other such "bad" demons, revolved around her. She lived for it, the feeling of being special. So what was this? What had happened to take that all away from her? What ever it was she didn't like it. She needed to be the center of his universe.
She was still talking, and once Anya began paying attention she nodded and held up her hand.
"I get it, Buffy." She said.
"You do? I was hoping that you would, because I just want to make sure that this is real, you know right now." She was twisting her hands together on her laps nervously. This Slayer, so strong, oldest there has ever been could so easily be rendered a pile of doubt and nerves when it came to matters of the heart.
"I understand." Anya sat up straighter. "Let me sum up. You made a wish, you got the wish, wish went bad, you undid it, and you are afraid that things are happening due to the wish."
"So you and Faith are now orgasm buddies, and that has you nervous?"
"What?!" She blanched. "No, not nervous, I just want to make sure I didn't screw anything up, that she is with me because she wants to be."
"How did it feel? And no I am not asking because I want the titillation."
"It was beautiful, and romantic, and sexy, and just perfect." Buffy sighed, a blush creeping into her cheeks.
"I am going to tell you something, and I hope you listen. So few of you seem to be willing to listen to me, why is that?"
"Right. Don't get hung up on the wish, it was just a gift to you, to show you inside of your heart, that you did love her. And Faith, she has loved you forever. Strongly, passionately. She has a hard time showing her emotions, but she loves you Buffy."
He came back into the library after having driven Dawn to work. The poor girl was having a most difficult time with that cast on her leg. Though they were all relieved that it had been a low break, resulting in a short cast, and not a full leg one. Maneuvering the girl in a full leg cast, with her amount of energy would be tempting the fate's rage. That girl had two speeds, hi and off.
But, that is what makes her unique.
Walking into the library, he watched for a moment as Willow read from two different texts simultaneously, skimming over the lines, jotting notes on her computer randomly. She was voracious when it came to learning new information. He whole-heartedly agreed with Giles that she would be a welcomed asset to the Watcher's Council. But he was tentative, unsure how to proceed in asking her if she would be willing to accept the offer that had been extended, due to her fragile emotional state. But, Holburn believed that her leaving for a while would be in her best interests, there was still so much pain, sadness claiming her features as their own. Providing her an outlet for her energies, in research would be good for her, and having at her disposal individuals to talk to about what she had been through, individuals who would not judge her or think her crazy for talking about magic, and Slayers, and Hellmouths. Yes, Holburn hoped that she would go.
"Dawn got off alright?" She asked not looking up.
"Yes, minimal grumbling, which was a nice improvement." He smiled stepping deeper into the room. "How are you fairing today?"
"Not so great."
"Really?" he sat down across from her.
"Ran into my Mother earlier, on my way over. Wasn't the happiest moment in the record of Willow moments." She grinned, but it was pained. He did all he could think to do, which was nod.
"Aside from that, how are things fairing for you?"
"Good I guess." She closed the books in front of her, running her fingers over her eyes. "How long will I be gone?" She asked, still not looking at him. His heart leapt for joy. He was thrilled for her.
"As long as you want. It is up to you, actually. When you feel you have had enough, learned enough you will return." He shrugged, as she looked at him.
"I really don't want to go, but I can't stay here. Not right now."
"Because of the Slayers?"
"Partially. I want them both to be happy, but wanting it and seeing it."
"Indeed." He agreed, and understood her.
"Something is telling me that I need to go, that this is what I am meant to do." She leaned back in the chair. "If you could please tell them, I accept the offer."
Surveying the room she knew she should feel good. Over the course of the past two months she had hunted, searched, and turned. Following Veronica's orders explicitly she had amassed this group who stood before her. Though most looked tired, with drawn and hungry expressions, probably because of the sun that was shinning brightly outside right now. They could all feel it, even Jane, but they were safe inside, behind the thick walls of the warehouse, the boarded windows.
Seven strong, agile warriors. That was what Veronica said they needed, to begin the plan. And Jane loved the plan. It was nothing grandiose, nothing unreachable. There would be no plays to open the Hellmouth. All that they were going to do was make the Slayers pay. Make them suffer. And the group of vampires standing before her would make that happen.
A small part of Jane wondered, why was her Sire, her Lover willing to go to such lengths to help her get her revenge. It was a nagging little itch in the back of her mind. That and the fact that she knew nothing really of the exotic vampire she took into her bed every night.
"You do understand what is required of you?" She asked the group, walking past them, loving the sound of the vinyl pants as her thighs rubbed together. She felt like she could walk for hours like this, with the sound. She felt strong. She felt powerful. Smiling widely as they all nodded, that indeed they knew what was required, she felt happy. This was going to be a very good time.
Buffy stood, watching as Faith took out the last vampire. He dusted away, and she slipped the stake back into her pocket while turning slowly. A faint smile played on her full dark lips, and Buffy felt a tingling in her arms, in her chest. The overwhelming desire to hold the brunette before her. It was astonishing, the emotions, the feelings that Faith made her feel. She had been so very blind to never acknowledge these feelings before. How had she lived a day without this?
"Like what you saw, Slayer?" Faith asked, walking slowly over to her. Buffy's heart was speeding up in its tempo.
"Very much." She replied startling herself at the depth of her tone.
"Thought you would," Faith stopped before her, tipping her head slightly to look into Buffy's eyes. She was seconds from melting away into a puddle of want.
"Oh, I did." She smiled back, taking her hand and cupping Faith's cheek. "You saved me, you know? I haven't felt this good, this alive, this well, real, in years." She said softly.
"I keep asking myself, what took me so long, why did I wait-" Buffy began.
"You weren't ready, and I probably wasn't ready. We needed to live through that to get where we are today."
"I'm ready now." Buffy said, watching as she leaned into her palm. Faith's eyes closed slowly, but her shoulders stiffened. Buffy wanted to desperately know what she was thinking, what she was feeling. What did all of this mean to her?
Buffy leaned up and pressed her lips to those before her, tasting the lipstick, the light saltiness of the skin above them. Faith's arms enveloped her, strongly, securely.
Feeling her in my arms, I would never get tired of that. For how ever long this lasted, until she grew bored and tired of me.
JUST STOP IT!
My mind yelled. Why did I always second-guess everything? Why did I think that-
It all stopped.
Her hands in my hair holding me close to her, as we kissed, pulling her lip into my mouth, sucking on it with abandon. Tongues caressing, learning, feeling. And inside all of the noise, it all stopped.
I wanted to loose myself in the kiss, in the feelings and smells of her, but I couldn't. This was one of those times when you needed to pay attention. One of those times that the light bulb flashed on, when things became so shockingly clear that you could not do a fucking thing to stop thinking about it.
In a moment, everything you thought you knew about yourself can change. Everything you believed when they told you, can change. In that one moment when clarity comes and the voice screaming in your mind, the one that berates you, telling you that you are not good enough, telling you that the pain and loneliness is what you deserve, that this is the best you will ever have... in that one moment of clarity, you hear, that is was never your voice saying those things, rather it was theirs. Fueled by jealousy, fueled by whatever need they had inside them to hold you back, to push you down. When all that they should have been doing was lifting you up.
After that moment, now is the time to find your true voice, listen to it, ringing out clearly. You are good enough, you don't deserve this pain, there is so much better that you can do, so much better you can have.
I pulled my lips away from hers, slowly. B looked up at me, her hazel eyes glittering in the moonlight.
"Love you." I whispered, meaning it completely, feeling it in every part of my body. It was the absolute truth.
With a grin, as she moved to lean forward, to kiss me again, she replied, "Love you."
...continued in Addiction...
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